When Nico Discovered Televison
by ProngsiemoonyPadsie
Summary: Nico's reactions to the televison. First thought to be a one-shot but since people wanted more of Nico's moments with percy. Anyways Read and Review!
1. Magic Moving Picture Box and Cookies

I was at Percy's house eating some blue cookies when Percy asked if I wanted to watch t.v. I stared at him. "What's t.v?" I asked, still nibbling on a blue cookie. This thing is damn good! Agh, I could really marry this cookie if I could. But I don't think it's legal in New York. Hmm, I should ask.

I was ripped out of my ADHD thinking by Percy. "You know the televison. The thing that rots your brain with cartoons and stupid reality shows."

"No I don't know." Well, I was raised in the 1940's not many people had televison sets. And I was one of them. Then Percy had a break through. I could tell because Percy had the look of realization on his stupid face. "Oh, that's right you didn't have t.v. back then. That must've sucked." Percy said.

I rolled my eyes and popped another cookie in my mouth. "Whatever Percy." I said, cookie crumbs falling out of my mouth. "Well," Percy said, with a stupid smile on his face. "time to show you what the t.v. is."

~Half of an Action movie later~

"AHHHH WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!" I yelled as an explosion happened on the magic moving picture box (a.k.a the t.v.).

"Nico. Nico. It's just a movie it won't hurt us!" Percy said, trying to calm me down. I stopped screaming like a manly sounding girl and sat back down. I sum how ended up in the ceiling fan. "Oh so it's just in the magic moving picture box."

"It's called a t.v. Nico. It's not magic."

"So how are all the unnaturally tiny people in the box then?"

"They're not tiny. The t.v. just makes them look tiny."

"So it is a magic moving picture box." The rest of the movie Percy tried to explain to me that the televison isn't magic. He didn't do a very good job. And it took me about a month to stop calling the 't.v', the magic moving picture box.


	2. Brussel sprouts and Chuck Norris

**Nico's Fight with Brussels Sprouts**

I was once again at Percy's house. The reason why I was over was because his mom, Ms. Sally, insisted or like I would like to put it _tricked _me into eating with them. I would have said no and shadow traveled the Hades out of there because they were going to have a 'well balanced meal'. And I just don't do _healthy _eating, but when Ms. Sally said blue cake for dessert. My will power crumbled like stepped on potato chips.

So now here I am poking at my fruit salad. Why do they call it a salad? It doesn't even have lettuce! This 'fruit salad' is a lie! It should not be worthy of calling itself a _salad_. "Nico, dear." Percy's mom said. "You haven't eaten any of your fruit salad and you haven't even looked at your Brussels sprouts." _In no why in Hades I'm I going to eat Brussels sprouts lady, _I thought. _Even if your freakishly blue cake is super damn good! _

But I couldn't say that, Ms. Sally was to nice. Also I'm pretty sure she wouldn't give me cake if she heard me say the word damn. So of course I said, "I ate Brussels sprouts for breakfast." Percy's mom didn't buy it. "Oh really?" Cue nervous nodding here. "Well then, who gave you Brussels sprouts?"

"Chuck Norris." Percy choked on his water. Which mystified me since he is Poseidon's son which meant that he was half fishy! Which also means that he might know where Nemo is! Oh my gosh, I should ask him if he can get me Dory's autograph.

"You met Chuck Norris in New York? What was he doing?" Ms. Sally raised one eyebrow. How does she do that? I try doing it with my other eyebrow duck typed to my face but it doesn't work. And it hurts when I pull of the type. So wait, where was I? Oh right! The question about Chuck Norris. Sorry, ADHD. "I met him when he was fending off some zombie aliens from Mars from destroying the earth." I said, still looking at her magical moving eyebrow. It's so magical!

"Zombie aliens from Mars?" At this time Percy and his stepfather, Paul, were trying to hold back their laughter. Well I'm sorry. I haven't had my daily happy meal. So my lies won't be as good was when I've had one. "Yes," I said, crossing my arms. "zombie aliens from Mars. Chuck Norris opened up a can of Brussels sprouts and swallowed them in one go! Then his muscles turned into mini Navy battle ships and put all six, once again _six _ZAMs into a chock hold."

"ZAMs?" Percy raised an eyebrow. Damn it! Him too? Are all Jacksons able to raise one eyebrow! Is that why Poseidon fell in love with Ms. Sally? Oh who am I kidding I would marry and have kids with a girl who could raise an eyebrow. But where can I find a girl with those specifications? "Yes, ZAMs it's an obviation for zombie aliens from Mars." I said matter-of-factly. He wouldn't last five seconds in _Are You Smatter than a 5th grader?_.

"Anyways, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, Chuck Norris held them until their head exploded like water balloons and alien guts flew everywhere!" I did explosion sounds and hand motions as he showed how Chuck Norris beat the chilly out of the ZAMs.

"And then when he beat up every last ZAMs, he saw me. And you know what he said?" I slammed my hands on the table and leaned towards Percy. "No, what?" Man, this boy doesn't know anything! How has he been able to get this far in school? Annabeth probably, poor girl has to date my idiot cousin. "He said, "Eat these Brussels sprouts, kid, and you'll be as awesome as me." and then he handed me a can of those green things and so I ate them. And so that's how I ate Brussels sprouts this morning." I crossed my arms and gave a satisfied smirk. Ms. Sally had to believe me. She may just give me two slices of blue cake for my amazing story telling abilities.

Ms. Sally had an not amused face on but then she smiled. Evilly if I may add. "Well then, you don't have to eat your Brussels sprouts." Cue mentally happy snoopy dance here. "But you still have to eat your fruit salad." Cue mentally snoopy getting shout in the head here.

"B-But why?"

"You never said you ate fruit this morning." Ms. Sally smirked. Damn.

"But-"

"Eat your salad or no cake!"

"Yes Ms. Sally." And thats how I was forced to eat my fruit salad. Damn that blue cake for being so damn good!


End file.
